Reference Points - Understanding Women

I think the key part of this statement is focusing on "the way a person IS" 
I think as guys especially newbs and intermediate guys the reference points are coming from the mentality/ mindset of a guy. The only reality/ filter the newb has is through the mind of a guy. How can you know what somebody IS if you don't understand how they process info? 

From a personal stand point, I didn't understand women for the longest time I had problems holding there attention. I had what I thought were funny entertaining interesting conversations (yet) the girls would always gravitated towards other guys. I had no idea why? I have always had good social intelligence but emotionally I wasn't connecting. 

Girls didn't get excited to call me again, they weren't excited to hang out w/ me again. If I ran into a girl at a bar again she vaguely remembered me. All despite having the same type of sense of humor same type of social intelligence today. So what gives? Emotional intelligence. 

You can try to sit there, focus all you want, but it's pointless if you don't have thousands of reference points from a thousand different girls, and you dont truly understand how they process info. You can sit me in front of a snake and put him through a myriad of different situations and I will have no idea how that snake feels about each one. Because I don't have the first clue how a snake processes his/ her environment. I can only "guess" how the snake feels, based on how that environment stimuli would make me feel. 

If you don't have many female reference points they might as well be a different species you can "think" you understand but your reference points will simply be your own. The reference points of a man. The point being, being around females is important. And the more you are around them in different types of settings, work, club/bar, gym, home, etc, etc and truly communicating w/ them the more you will understand there emotional state. You will have correct reference points not just the ones you are projecting on them from your point of view. 

Basically Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus. Unless you spend a lot of time on Venus you simply cannot understand. We are completely different males and females.

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